the bonsai man

Enduring adversity from all angles
    brutally beautiful
             in his creator’s gaze
                     & mine

  the art of mimicking invulnerability
                   @ a seconds notice
                           direct — to obstinate
                    nurturing nature’s perfection

           never pleading for reprieve
     merely the strength to withstand
                             given the need


pondering soft revenge

I’m recalling memories
    that never existed
     replaying Cassandra
          on cassette

    all these Greek busts
       turn dead eyes to sadness
          relishing dark overtones
             like silk between
                my fingers

        God I hate this block
          I’m bleeding out


bored at 4AM

It really is the darkest of mindsets
   near before the sun rises
         & I promise    I am not tired
                 only bored at four
     somehow the color of night
       is never devoid of any

   Cynical as I am
      I’m always looking forward
         to the dawn
     Whereupon we meet again


never fade.

At the end of it all
    I hate my humanity
       & its easy failings
           I hate the concept
             of perfection

       & what it stands for
            admiring from a distance
             everything and more
               when it comes to you


elbow deep

Last night I don’t remember
          watching the stars
                   just you

      A shade swathed
in deep cognac tones
      still burned into my brain
              milliseconds before
     fading into shadow

Cardboard bodies burn

               &      tentatively
          I don’t remember reaching for more

               but I believe it



Johnny come lately is a showrunner
       & the same Johnny on the spot
             showed right on time

     there are hours I can’t retrieve
        more or less I believe
            it’s the synergy


imposter syndrome.

you’ve made fools of us both,
         & now we stare upon each other
               in perfect symmetry
       ‘the same,’ but disturbed
                  to the point we’re inhuman

            I cannot help but blame you



Actively seeking to remain unseen
     like a creeping rootstalk
         outstretched in both directions
         I’d rather be in arms/
                 than your arms

       where do I fall currently/
                  somewhere between
        peppermint and precious owl orchids
                        shivering in the air
                    unable to shake the fantasy
                               @ four-twenty