tell me I’m wrong I dare you

I am searching for stars
   surrounded by concrete
     bricks & bricks of
     low key   degradation

   Watching you pretending to sip tea
  chattering phosphorus
      so much you make me believe
               this matters

           & it matters
             because you don’t understand
       what I do moment to moment
        and silently I gotta say I’m in love

             I tell you with no confusion
            & maybe you’re losing it
      but while I’m here
              you’ll always have a safety net

    I promise you that



I’ve run dry of tears tonight
   I think that may be my oversight
        But I can tell when the gaslight
                                                   is on
 & No I’m not feeling very strong
             my message is brooding
                  I have to remind myself to keep

In and out in and out just keep filtering
      Oxygen ignore the choking sounds
       I’m trying I’m still trying even to me it’s
               Even when it’s mouthed
               & I know the voice in your heart
                Like the tremor in mine
                is keeping time with these words
                          but lately they’re all I’ve got

           I’m not watching clocks I’m not
         measuring time I’m not disciphering
   symbols in dreams because none apply
                              not to you or I or where
                              my creator may reside
       I wanted so bad to make an impact
         & I think I have so why can’t I
                  abandon my post and say

                 I’m not used to it, I rarely do it
                            There’s so much blood
                        on this metaphorical floor of
                                                  mine &
                     Maybe it was like this always

                      My world can be beautiful
               & tangible, dreamy and erased
                                  burst into flames
                     I need armor, I need weapons
                                    I need defacement
                                     or maybe it’s just so
                      simple it just comes down to
                                       an embrace


[Authors Note: inspired by In the House, In A Heartbeat by John Murphy]