carefully swallowing
       horse sized pills
       I don’t choke

       even now I have
       no fucking clue
       what they do…
       or how t ▪he▪ y work|
       neither does anyone

       sounds… eerily familiar
       [ Doesn’t it? It should ]

Maybe I’m having a lapse
    of false memory/
    & my brain is really protecting me
              from cyanide truths


proceed with caution

I gave you the slip
   beneath my dress
      and by this act
            scrambled your mind

  I’ve wrestled the salt
                 from my hair
      and now questions/
       of  loyalties lie

          for now
          for always
       the clock strikes two am
     and there’s no one around
  but you and your voice in my head
       this could be momentous
           I will say I’m honor-bound

         and hyper focused
         I cannot sleep
  our bed is not the only question
         that’s loaded

        it’s never been



I can faintly translate this
                bond I swore/
     an acute immortal loyalty to an
                      obscure life

keep me so close
    right next to your throat

               so when you speak I sense
         arrangements I do not resist
      & arrive again to the conclusion
                that in the end,
             you s h a t t e r me back

        into place&perhaps

it was always so…


shallow breaths

I glimpse these hues
 dark umber, taupe and ash
       shadows on my photograph
      whisk across your face
      people say, mine does not age
       but.         [I am always changing]

         I have to be at the airport
            in two hours



Dark umber, taupe and ash
       shadows on my photograph
      splash across your face
      people say, mine does not age
       but.         [I am always changing]

         I have to be at the airport
            in two hours
                        & mediocrity



in thought

I admire the tattoos on your skin
                 they stimulate &
        give away [subtle hints]
          to who you might’ve been
                   |before me|
                  You know,
            all those past sins
             but I want to worship…
        figures, my Creator proves
             he can hide better than I
      any fucking hour of the day

  I’ll pretend Friday is hump day
            even though like Nine Inch Nails
       sang: everyday is exactly the same
          Maybe it is, because it’s without you
      So I’m left to languish
          arbitrarily fastening what should be
              torn and I’m not old fashioned
       I’m pretty damned | I’m impressionable
                    《which is to say》
                              I leave



  You cannot be heard
         nor may you be seen
          because who could believe
                           she likes to be watched
 the mystic mythic magic of the seer
              but the only truth
              is sung agonizingly nearby

Cloaked in perfumed fog
            full lips & rustic tongue
                 her song is ancient

              you may have stumbled
                 upon a fragile carnal bounty
                     tiny fangs twinkling
                          as she smiles
Everything is     delicate

             you shall not remember what day
                       nor  what age you are

Authors Note: Inspired by The Last Kingdom

Nocturne Op55 No 1. 

I sense fingers in the dark
     my hands their own machinery
      I sense you’d have me
      describe my own topography
      My linguistics &
                       my monopoly

     Do I do battle in armor
                or a body conscious dress?
   Do I show fashionably late at the door
              when I was never a guest?

  I sense fingers in the dark
       crossed for my collapse
              they are not mine

   They are not mine


deer in headlights

she bares her flesh to me
             glowing sungold under the moon
    [So]  I can’t quite call her
                   a marble statue
  some such sight I’m sure you’d glimpse
                              in the Louvre
             & fall quite passionately
                yearning to touch, to fold
                           fingers against her spine
                     in real time

                  But then
                       unwittingly I freeze…
                 rebel against my every thought
                    my tongue netted with desire
                                  & saliva & I think
                        I have just met
                                    a goddess of lust
                       because I am struck
                          Struck silent
                          when she comes to life
             places her hand on my chest and
      purrs so lovingly
    I just wanna feel your heartbeat



I want to fill your hands
          like a stainless steel flask
                I want you to eat
           and drink me, like Alice . . .
Before this I could’ve
                never answered the question,
               because the looming answer
                             seemed so timed. . .
                                           [against unknown
                                              running towards

    Somewhere, your spirit is smirking
                       I know you, you said, &
                                    I asked, why is a
                                  raven like a writing



Cra/cked ceramic bowls  

were once repaired with gold

                         celebrated and preened
                instead of decried

         for their flaws

never crushed and thrown in trash heaps
the way I’ve treated myself lately___